Tag Archives: risk

The Catalyst for Change

7 Oct

Three years ago I arrived in Truckee, California.  Several days earlier I’d left Michigan, where I’d lived my entire life, and drove out there via the scenic route.  At that time, all I knew was that I needed a change.  I didn’t know what I needed and I certainly didn’t know how I was going to do it, but moving across the country seemed like a good first step.

It was.  Sure, moving across the country in a reliable car, without having to borrow money, or at least having a job waiting would have been a better first step, but I was able to make progress without getting caught up in perfection.

Moving did not solve my problems, but it did show me which problems were caused by my circumstances and which problems were caused by me.  Moving did change my circumstances and it showed me that I can do big, life-changing things pretty much any time I want to, if I just take that first leap.

I made my first step toward change because I was incredibly unhappy and didn’t know how to help myself; all I could do was something drastic.  Is it like that for everyone?  Is change usually brought on by duress?  What happens when things get better — do you keep trying to change or do you become satisfied?

I guess the short version of what I’m asking is what’s your catalyst for change?


Wonderful Spokane?

30 Jul
Spokane river as it flows passed Canada Island...

Image via Wikipedia

I just read through all of my Reverb10 posts.  A few of them are still very relevant, perhaps even more so now than ever.  Moving to Spokane, away from the awe-inspiring Sierra Nevadas, has decreased my sense of wonder dramatically.  To be honest, I routinely hate it here.  It’s a nice place, with nice people, and I’m getting that Biggest Little City in the World vibe (without the vice) that I so enjoy.  Unfortunately there’s nothing here that just takes my breath away the way Tahoe did.

I’m not sure Spokane is the place to capture the thrill of living, but I’m here for the next year.  I think the best way to embrace the situation is to spend time working on me and to experience a sense of wonder in my own accomplishments.  Maybe I need to be here so I can change my core story.

One thing that will help, is to take more risks.  I need to push myself in new ways, and I can’t let habit and security hold me back.  Living in Spokane is one of the safest choices I could have made; now I need to create my own adventures.

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Body and Risk

3 Dec
Sami woman on skis, adapted from Olaus Magnus,...
Image via Wikipedia

Reverb10: Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).  (Author: Ali Edwards)

There are several moments, all of them important.

The first moment was less a moment and more a season; I made real progress with my skiing last winter and it showed itself in my ability to ski steeper, scarier terrain.  I was able to enjoy some terrain that I never thought I’d be able to ski.  I made some new mental connections and clarified exactly what I’m trying to do when I teach my own lessons*.  I love skiing more than anything else and it shows.

Another moment came after taking some drugs and spending the evening in bed.  I felt an incredibly strong connection to both my body and my partner and I want those connections (not necessarily that partner) to become a frequent part of my life.

The last moment also involved sex; a couple of months ago I had amazing chemistry with a casual encounter.  I felt very comfortable trying new things and taking a few risks with him.  I had a wonderful time with him and feel our night was something I’ve needed.

All three of these incidents brought me closer to my body via some sort of risk.  I am not suggesting that I should make 2011 the year of stupidity and recklessness, but I need to pay more attention to my body and I need to be less afraid to take a few chances.  I’ll be okay; I’ll actually probably be better.

*I am trying to teach people to use their bodies to find the same joy I do.  I don’t want my clients to walk away with a few pleasant memories; I want them to walk away fully addicted and in love.