Tag Archives: chef

And in another world…

5 Dec

Reverb10: Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? (Author: Alice Bradley)

My relationship with Chef ended, and while it obviously upset me at first, I am remarkably okay with it.  It was an important relationship and I enjoyed it, but I also knew from the beginning that our situation could only be temporary.  Things ended, not as I wanted them to, but as we knew they would.  It’s okay.

No, what’s more interesting is what I didn’t let go of.  Claytor.  It’s been over two years and I still miss him.  I hate that our friendship came to this point and I hate that there doesn’t seem to be anything I can do or anything he’s willing to do.  I resent that when I went to the bar on my trip home, he was there to watch me; not to talk to me, not to fight with me, but simply to watch me.  I hate that we’re both unhappy with the situation and I hate him for his part in creating it.

I know that I should have let this go long ago, but I think losing him broke me and I’m still putting the pieces back together.

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