I grew up Catholic, but around the age of nine, I began questioning that and soon rejected it on feminist grounds. (Seriously.) In high school I began to do some reading on Wicca and paganism, which had an appeal, but a lot of what I was reading was historically and scientifically inaccurate, so that didn’t take either.
Later I identified as an atheist, but I’m not. I might not believe in the Judeo-Christian god, and I might have problems with the idea of a variety of rather specific gods and goddesses to choose from, but I do have faith that there is something larger than myself, and something worth a bit of reverence.
Last year I tried going to Quaker meeting (the unprogrammed version) and I enjoyed it. It was an hour each week to sit in contemplative silence, giving attention to faith and waiting for something to speak to me. I’ll probably continue that in the future, but it’s not a practical choice for me here in Spokane. It allowed for me to be agnostic, but still actively interested, which I appreciated. (Several members of that particular meeting were Christ focused, but no one felt moved to evangelize.)
Looking back, faith has always been a part of my core story. I remember having endless discussions with my more devout friends, and even going to church with them purely out of (respectful) curiosity. It’s always been an interest and right now it’s an interest I would like to pursue. I don’t need answers, but I would like to have room for both faith and doubt in my life. I would like to find a way to satisfy my appreciation of science and fact while still giving attention to my faith in the as yet unknown.
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If you’re comfortable, please tell me about your faith or lack thereof. I am always very interested in how people feel about this subject, so I would love to hear your thoughts. Also, if you have any relevant books (besides obvious choices such as the Bible) that made an impression on you, I would appreciate the recommendation.